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Category (RELIGION)


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   Agnostics can do anything if they have something to not believe in
   Are 'father', 'son', and 'holy ghost' all aliases for 'God', or does it read mail in its separate entities?
   Beware of the Vampire Jesus--He gave his blood for you and he wants it all back now!
   Campus Crusade for Cthulhu--It found me
   Christians do it with Grace
   Curb your god
   Death?  Life?  I never did understand Zen.
   Don't bother me.  I've got my three miracle minimum.  When the Pope signs my sainthood papers, I'm outta here!
   Evolution in action [picture of Christian fish with legs]
   Evolved-Again Secular Humanist
   Giving up Catholicism for Lent
   God created music so people could pray without words
   God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference
   God is love--but get it in writing
   I am a Quaker. In case of emergency, please be quiet.
   I am not a monotheist--the world looks as though it was designed by a committee
   I died for your sins, and all I got was this lousy button
   I found Jesus, and he said, "Tag, you're it!"
   I'd be an agnostic if I cared that much
   The idea that God is His own grandmother may be unsupported by Scripture, but who wants to offend God's grandmother?
   If God dwells within us, I hope He likes enchiladas because that's what He's getting
   If Jesus was Jewish, why did he have a Mexican name?
   If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
   Indulgences are Papal, too
   Is YOUR religion BATF-approved?
   It is easier for a camel to pass through a needle's eye if both are lightly greased
   It's a Jewish thing--if you've got a little time, I'll explain it to you
   Jesus is coming--if He's late, your second savior is free
   Jewish mystics do it by dybbuk
   Lead me not into temptation--I can find it for myself
   Let's leave religion to the televangelists.  After all, they're the professionals.
   The lion and the lamb shall lie down together, but the lamb won't get much sleep
   Live Lent in the fast lane
   Martyrdom is the oldest way of achieving fame without ability
   Militant Agnostic--I don't know and you don't either!
   Obtain one Lamb o' God.  Garnish with about 90 vegetables and seal up tightly with Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms.  Allow them to stew in their own juices for 51 days, then sear quickly using a wood fire.  Serves one media circus.
   Permanent Mobile Sabbath--On the Sabbath, it is forbidden to work, even on your character
   Practice atheism, the religion of the gods!
   Relaxed Agnostic   I don't know any answers   I'm not looking very hard, either
   These are my opinions.  If they were the biblical truth, your bushes would be burning.
   Thou shalt eat green eggs and ham--obey thy God, I-am-that-I-am
   To you I'm an agnostic.  To God, I'm the loyal opposition.
   Why can't the Buddha vacuum under his sofa?  He has no attachments
   Yin yang with Christian fish and Darwin fish
   You'll go to Heck if you don't believe in Gosh
   [Yin/Yang]
   I went to the bathroom and they elected me Antichrist
   Do Catholic vegetarians believe in transubstantiation?
   I'm an atheist. It's a simple faith, but it comforts me.
   Recovering Catholic
   Recovering Fundamentalist
   Tithe if you love Jesus.  Any fool can honk.
   What do you get if you cross a Unitarian and a Jehovah's Witness?  Someone who knocks on your door and asks, "Now what do *you* believe?"
   I believe in Original Sin, and someday I hope to commit one
   AIDS is a disease. Pat Robertson is a punishment from God.   
   Gods don't kill people. People with gods kill people.,   
   Judaism: an argument between God and His chosen pilpul   
   God is who. Evolution is how.  
   Anything with "Science" in its name isn't one....Political Science, Christian Science, Creation Science, Computer Science  
   God wrote the program, evolution is the output, meteor strikes are the reset button  
   Kill one person, you're a murderer. Kill a hundred people, you're a terrorist. Kill a million people, you're a government. Kill everyone, you're a god.  
   Welcome to heaven. Here's your harp and your tuning key. Welcome to hell. Here's your harp.
   You're here to save my soul? I'm here to test your faith  
   Religion isn't the cause of war, it's the excuse  
   To have a few doubts is normal. To have many doubts is a crisis of faith. To have contant doubts is to be a Unitarian Universalist.   
   Unitarian Bible Study Today!  Bring your own bible and scissors   
   Universalists think God is too good to send them to hell. Unitarians think they are too good for God to send them to hell.   
   [Chalice]  
   What part of infinity do you not understand?   
   WWJD? JWRTFM!   
   Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.... Forget this, and achieving enlightenment will be the least of your worries   
   Many are willing to serve God, but only in an advisory capacity   
   No matter how sick the Pope gets, they never send him to Lourdes   
   A Unitarian is an atheist with children
   UU Time--why nothing important happens until fifteen minutes into the meeting  
   Still not God....   
   Lucifer was pushed!  
   Cats are taoists. They know the way and are always in it.  
   Drag God into politics, and you've ruined His reputation before you know it
   God said to Noah, "On your ark, get set, go!"  
   What kind of car does God drive? A Plymouth. "For He drove them out of the garden in His Fury."
   It really does say Adam and Steve. That's what you get for depending on translations.
   If God had wanted us to have safe sex, He would have made rubber grow on trees
   The temperature of Hell is measured in degrees Calvin
   Support the separation of church and hate
   What would the Flying Spaghetti Monster do?
   If atheism is a religion, baldness is a hair color
   Touched by His Noodly Appendage  
   It's hard to be religious when certain people aren't struck by lightning
   God wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts
   A Buddhist nudist practices yoga bare
   I want you to know I've talked to God, and He agrees with me completely
   If you find God hates the same people you do, you may have created Him in your own image
   My monkey is ashamed to be related to the Kansas Board of Education
   If your religion never surprises you, you're probably doing it wrong
   Jews for Exegesis
   Bad deity, bad! No apocalypse!
   I'll meet you in the lake of fire with my asbestos duckie
   You put your hand on the Bible and swear to protect the Constitution, not the other way around
   Religion isn't the opium of the people any more--it's speed  
   WTFWJD?
   Mel Gibson's remake of The Life of Brian isn't nearly as funny as the original
   Muslim...it's the new gay
   The World Trade Center attack was a faith-based initiative
   The Bible talks about St. Paul, but never mentions Minneapolis
   If God is your co-pilot, move over
   The invisible and the non-existent often look very much alike
   Talmud: the original hypertext, Midrash: the original fan fiction
   TGI[shin]
   Not only does the Pope believe in evolution, he's a Primate
   That voice in your head? IT'S NOT ME. ---God  
   Can God make rock so heavy he can't thrash to it?   
   Christianity has Pagan DNA
   The school day should start with a moment of science
   Proud to be a humble Quaker
   If you mix religion and politics, you get politics
   "Intelligent Design?" my knees say *not*.
   My atheist superpower is that I can't be damned.
   Intelligent Design? My knees say "not".
   Blasphemy is a victimless crime
   God is watching-- it's a good thing He's easily amused  
   The laws are not the government. The government is not the country. The holy text is not the religion.
   By the Flying Spaghetti Monster's meaty balls!
   God should have forbidden Adam and Eve from eating the SERPENT
   I turn the other cheek. I only have four of them, so SO DON'T OVERDO IT!

Stickers

   Falwell and Robertson don't speak for me!
   Extremism in defense of religion is no virtue.
   There is no freedom OF religion without freedom FROM religion
   Militant Agnostic. I don't know, and you don't either!
   Jesus is coming! LOOK BUSY
   MY MIND IS NOT FOR SALE OR RENT TO ANY GOD OR GOVERNMENT
   [fish with legs] You keep believing... we'll keep evolving!
   I'm doing my part to piss off the Religious Reich
   The "New Right" is fundamentally wrong
   The problem with religious texts is that the answers aren't in the back, either.
   The fundies keep telling me I'm going to Hell and they're going to Heaven. If they aren't there, it won't be Hell, so I guess we're all going to the same place!
   He's YOUR God. They're YOUR rules. YOU burn in Hell!
   Who are you to question why your god doesn't want me to believe in him?
   Fundamentalism stops a thinking mind
   ZenCrafters Total enlightenment in about an hour!
   Omnipotent Omniscient Omnibenevolent - Pick two.
   Freedom of Religion means ALL Religions
   In case of Rapture, can I have your car?
   The "Christian Right" is NEITHER
   150 Million True Believers. 144,000 taken up in the Rapture. Do YOU feel LUCKY?
   I get along with God just fine. It's his fan clubs that I can't stand.
   If you believe you can tell me what to think, I believe I can tell you where to go.
   Remember when this [Christian fish] wasn't a WARNING LABEL?
   Going to church no more makes you a Christian than going swimming makes you a fish
   Belief is no substitute for knowledge
   The ways are many... The Light is one! (with graphics of Yin/Yang, Kokopelli, Ankh, Pentacle, Cross, Star of David, Muslim Star/Crescent, Sikhism, and Buddha)
   God is who. Evolution is how.

ADVICE
ANARCHY
ANGST
ANIME
ANTI-BUSH
THE ARTS
ATTITUDE, ARROGANCE, BOASTING
BABIES AND OTHER RELATIVES
BACKRUBS AND HUGS
BITCHINESS AND PMS
BOOKS
BUREAUCRACY
CAFFEINE
CATS
CHOCOLATE
COME ONS, TURNDOWNS, SEX, GENDER
COMPUTERS: General
COMPUTERS: Angst
COMPUTERS: Bugs
COMPUTERS: Dealing with Users
COMPUTERS: Jobs
COMPUTERS: Personal Computers (DOS, MAC, etc.)
COMPUTERS: Programming
COMPUTERS: Puns
COMPUTERS: Specific Languages (C, COBOL, OTHERS)
COMPUTERS: Unix and Related OS's
COMPUTERS: Email, social media, the web, and usenet
CROSSOVER
CTHULHU
CYNICISM
DISCORDIANISM
DOGS
DRINKING AND DRUGS
DRIVING
ELECTION 2004
FAERIE
FANDOM
FIBER ARTS
FIRST AMENDMENT
FANTASY
FANTASY ROLE-PLAYING
FOOD
IDEALISM
INSANITY
KINKY
LANGUAGE
LATENESS
L337 and LOLCAT
LEFT-HANDEDNESS AND DYSLEXIA
LIBRARIES
MAGIC: THE GATHERING
MATHEMATICS
MEDIA
MEDICAL
MEDIEVALISM
MILITARY AND WAR
MONEY
MOOD AND TEMPERAMENT
MORNINGS, SLEEP DEPRIVATION
MURPHY'S LAWS
MUSIC
9/11
NINJA
NUMBER OF THE BEAST
OBSCURE
PAGANISM
PARADOXES AND LOGIC
PIRATES
POLITICS
PUNS
PURPLE
REALITY
RELIGION
RIDDLES
SCHOOL
SCIENCE
SECOND AMENDMENT
SCIENCE FICTION
SICK HUMOR
SILLINESS
SMOKING AND NON-SMOKING
SONG PARODIES
SPACE
STRESS
UNITARIAN UNIVERSALISM
UNIVERSAL TRUTHS
VAMPIRES
VIOLENCE
VERY SECRET DIARIES
WEAPONS
WEIRDNESS
WORK
WRITING
ZOMBIES
MISCELLANEOUS

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