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Category (MATHEMATICS)


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   After a correction has turned out to be a mistake, it will be impossible to fit the original quantity back into the equation
   Aleph-null bottles of beer on the wall....
   Before my sword can pass through your neck it has to pass halfway through your neck.  But before it can pass halfway through your neck, it has to pass a quarter of the way through your neck, and before it can do *that*....  ---Xeno, Warrior Prince
   Black holes are where God is dividing by zero
   The differential of hi over ho is ho di hi minus hi d ho over ho ho
   Don't drink and derive--know your limits   This kind of humor is integral to calculus
   43% of all statistics are worthless
   Fractals--what you see is what you wait for
   The generation of random numbers is much too important to be left to chance
   How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?  One, who gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing it to the earlier riddle
   I have found a wonderful counterexample, but it won't fit in this universe --Fermat
   I'm sorry, but the number you have dialed is imaginary. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and dial again.
   In mathematics, we don't understand things--we just get used to them
   Infinity is where you transfer from one parallel line to another
   Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out
   Irrationality is the square root of all evil
   It's chaos pure and simple [with detail of Mandelbrot set]
   Life is complex--it's partly real and partly imaginary
   lim (3->4)  <square root of>3 = 2
   Math for life, not for tests
   Mathematician: a machine for converting coffee into theorems
   Non-linear, far from equilibrium, and strangely attracted
   Of course I'm normal--I'm perpendicular to everything else
   Pi r^2   Pie are not square   Pie are round   Cornbread are square
   Politics is for the moment.  An equation is for eternity.
   The reality you have dialed is not in service.  Please check the value of pi or consult your local deity.
   A sine curve goes off to infinity, or at least to the end of the blackboard
   Strange attractors--getting there is half the fun
   355/113 Not the famous irrational number pi, but an incredible simulation!
   To be or not to be   <plus or minus the square root of> 4b^2
   2+2=5, for moderately large values of two
   2^2^666 + 1   The Prime Number of the Beast....ok, *you* prove it isn't prime
   x^n + y^n = z^n has no integer solutions other than 0 for n>2   I have a wonderful proof, but it won't fit on a button
   Recursion is easy.  You take a big problem, break off a managable chunk, and are left with a bigger chunk.
   Shouldn't pi be a round number?  Well, it's around 3.14   
   There are 10 kinds of people, those who are comfortable with binary, and those who aren't   
   Calculus: the agony and dx/dt  
   Using lotteries to support education is a conflict of interest
   What part of infinity do you not understand?   
   I believe in the Trinity... GOOGLE, BAYES' THEOREM, AND THE GODDESS BELLDANDY  
   6 x 9 = 42--All your base 13 are belong to us
   The secret message in pi is in Hebrew--we'll have to start decoding from the end
   The cost of innumeracy is incalculable
   What do you get if you cross a tse-tse fly with a mountain climber? Undefined. A tse-tse fly is a vector and a mountain climber is a scalar.  
   Find x [right triangle with sides labelled 3, 4, and x--an arrow points to the x with "here it is"]
   There are 10 kinds of people: those who understand trinary, those who don't, and those who are reaching for a dictionary
   If money is the root of all evil, it must be imaginary
   [Venn diagram] [[People I have shot] [The sheriff]] [The deputy]
   "Get real" [says PI] "Be rational" [says the square root of -1]
   1. Make a list of the top 10 ways to amuse a geek. 10. Use binary.
   Over 90% of people have an above average number of legs
   GE[squared]K
   f(x) went into a bar. "Sorry", said the bartender. We don't cater to functions.
   My parents went to a planet without bilateral symmetry, and all they got me was this lousy F-shirt
   The glass, being topologically equivalent to a finite flat sheet, can be neither 'full' nor 'empty': it may or may not have some beer balanced on it.
   The volume of a pizza of thickness 'a' and radius 'z' is given by pi*z*z*a
   My parents went to a planet without bilateral symmetry, and all I got was this lousy F-shirt
   Christmas = Halloween Dec 25 = Oct 31
   I am an English major. You do the math.
   I feel like I'm trapped in a Klein bottle-- I must have woken up on the wrong side of the Moebius strip
   The Dark Side has cookies, the Nerd Side has pi
   Dear Algebra, Stop asking us to find your X. They're not coming back. We don't know Y, either.
   Statistically speaking, only one dwarf in seven is Happy
   Divide by cucumber error, please reinstall universe and reboot
   If you put root beer in a square cup, do you get beer?

Stickers

   Alcohol and calculus don't mix NEVER DRINK AND DERIVE!
   Support the Math Illiteracy Tax - Buy Lottery Tickets
   When cryptography is outlawed, 7c%K@mp8T=;Rfs9bVhi*5xFwW/Q[uY
   Calculus: The agony and dx/dt   

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  Object-oriented COBOL: ADD ONE TO COBOL
 

 

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