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Category (COMPUTERS: Personal Computers (DOS, MAC, etc.))


Buttons

   Abandon all hope, ye who PRESS ENTER here
   Amiga: the computer for the creative mind MacIntosh: The computer for the rest of us
   Apple Computers: We invent the future in computing, and bury it.  And really, we know what's best.
   As MS-DOS came into common use, people stopped fearing that computers would take over the world
   C: \Coffee.exe not found, reboot user? Y/N?
   C:\DOS  C:\DOS\RUN  C:\DOS\RUN\WINDOWS  C:\DOS\RUN\SLOOOW
   C>: Reality.sys not found, reboot universe?  Y/N?
   DOS Dinosaur Operating System
   DOS never says "EXCELLENT command or file name"
   The easiest way to accelerate a Mac is 9.8/sec^2, but it's the ONLY way to accelerate an IBM
   42? 7.5 million years, and all you got was....oh, you were running Windows
   HAL 9000: "Dave, put those Windows disks down...Dave...DAVE!"
   If I'd wanted a Macintosh, I would have bought one
   If Windows 95 is really Y2K compliant, shouldn't it be called Windows 1995?
   In a world without fences, who needs Gates?
   Intel: putting the backward into backward compatible
   It's easier to fix Unix than to live with NT
   MacIntosh Machine Always Crashes, If Not, The Operating System Hangs
   Microsoft will make something that doesn't suck the day it starts manufacturing vacuum cleaners
   MS-DOS didn't get as bad as it is overnight--it took ten years of careful development
   MS-DOS--Just say no
   MY computer was easy to use ten years ago
   Nobody's really stupid--they're just running DOS
   Not everyone NEEDS a Macintosh.  Not everyone needs a Ferrari, either.
   Now that hell has frozen over and Germany has reunited, the only thing that would surprise me would be if Apple and IBM....
   OS/2 for PS/2--Half an operating system for half a computer
   Press ENTER to go on to the next button
   PS/2--yesterday's hardware today.  OS/2--yesterday's software tomorrow.  OS/2 Ext.--today's software real soon now
   The release of Windows 2000 has been moved back to the first quarter of 1901
   Speak, friend, and enter.  If you don't press enter, nothing happens.
   There are two types--those who hate the x86 architecture, and liars
   To shut down your system, type "WIN"
   VirusScan: "Windows Found: Remove it?  (Y/N)"
   We are Microsoft.  OS/2 is irrelevant.  UNIX is irrelevant.  Openness is futile. Prepare to be assimilated.
   What are we going to do tonight, Brain?  The same thing we do everynight, Pinky: reinstall Windows 95
   When in doubt, press CNTRL-ALT-DEL
   Windows & Icons & Mice OH MY!
   Windows detected.  Delete?  (Yes/Hell Yes)
   Windows is a pane in the glass
   Windows isn't a virus--viruses DO something
   Windows 95--a 32 bit graphical interface to a 16 bit patch on an 8 bit OS for a 4 bit processor by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition
   Windows 95 = Amiga 85
   Windows 95 = Macintosh 86
   Windows 95--Looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck--too bad it's a decoy
   Windows 95: So intuitive, it only needs one meg of help files
   Windows NT--nice try, next time
   Windows--the only virus that takes up 20 megs of RAM
   Windows 98: Y2K = 2030
   WinErr 16547: LPT not found.  Use backup. (PENCIL&PAPER.SYS)
   X windows--it could be worse, but it'll take time
   Your mouse pointer has moved.  You must reboot Windows for this change to take effect.
   Microsoft multi-processing: fouling up three things at once
   If Bill Gates had a nickel for every time Windows crashed....Oh wait! He does!
   It took Windows to make me appreciate DOS
   Working with Unix is like wrestling with a worthy opponent.  Working with Windows is like attacking a small whining child who is carrying a .38.
   How do you open the windows in an Eastern Orthodox church?  Click on the ikons
   Come to the Dark Side XP, young user
   See [picture of Linux penguin] run. See [Windows logo] run... scared
   No HATE except for Microsoft ['HATE' is in large letters with circle and slash, 'except for Microsoft' is in small letters]
   Macintosh for productivity. Linux for development. Palm for mobility. Windows for solitaire.  
   Minesweeper Consultant, Solitaire Expert  (capital letters heavily emphasized)
   IE doesn't have security holes, IE *is* a security hole

Stickers

   Running Microsoft? What do you want to fix today?
   Microsoft will make something that doesn't suck when they start manufacturing vacuum cleaners

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